This blog has now moved!

We have merged the blog posts into the Little Troopers website so everything is in one easy place for you.

To follow Louise's blogposts on her deployment journey and keep up with all the news from the Little Troopers charity head over to Little Troopers Blog

I'm right there with you

It really has been a manic 10 days or so but here I am past 8pm sat on my laptop a few days before Christmas (with presents to buy and wrap still!) sitting and reflecting on all of you who I have met this week, your stories are imprinted in my mind and I have cried tears for all of you at various points.

I am also crying writing this post....a) they are I am so exhausted tears and b) because my heart aches for so many of you who are separated this Christmas.

I have spent Christmases with my husband deployed and the memory of those times are etched deep within me, I didn't want to put a tree up, I didn't want to be festive, I didn't want to go to parties and I didn't want to hear of all the lovely things everyone else was doing with their families because mine was fragmented.

Nothing I write will make you feel better about a solo Christmas and there is no right or wrong way for you to get through the next couple of weeks, but just know that you will, I promise.

Over the last week I have met lots of Little Troopers and their families through some projects we have worked on with LaplandUK, firstly we reunited two families which was one of the most rewarding things I have ever witnessed. From sitting with the nervous dad's waiting to see their families after months and months, to standing outside the Santa lodge hearing the sobs from children who were finally reunited with their parents to crying silently with the team who brought it together to watching the children wearing the biggest smiles walking hand in hand with the early Christmas present they had so longed for. I will never forget that day.

Waiting to hear the cue to reunite our Royal Navy dad with his Little Troopers

 

A few days later I was back at snowy LaplandUK this time with military families who had someone deployed over Christmas this year, to sprinkle some Christmas magic.

I get so emotional because it is always so close to home for me; I've felt that longing to cuddle my husband, I have felt that sadness of a Christmas on my own, I have felt that resentment of other people enjoying time together, I have felt that helplessness when my daughter misses her dad so much. Those tears are because I'm living and breathing this life right by your side.

The LaplandUK scheme doesn't cost the charity any money just time and love and energy to bring it together and I can't lie, it is always stressful in December but as I am winding down for the holidays I can sit and smile and know I did my very best to make as many Little Troopers as possible make a memory even though Mummy or Daddy wont be at home this Christmas and I am sending all my love and hugs to you.

As you know my husband deploys in the New Year so I am tip toeing into this Christmas with the black cloud slowly creeping into my consciousness, I know its on the horizon and that brings that weird feeling in my tummy when I think about it which will only get more frequent as deployment day looms. Right now though we are working our way though that list of endless festive things I booked to bimble though hopefully making some nice memories (read previous post here on this!)

I will write an after Christmas post and let you know how it goes and I will also write a post about what to buy the military partner who is going away for most of the following year! I've struggled but there's a few things I've found that I want to share, you might find them useful (obvs can't write it yet pre Christmas as he tends to be a lurker and reads these posts sometimes!)

I should also touch on The Sun newspaper article that ran last week about the charity, you can read it HERE, Little Troopers is in dark times financially with the pennies seriously drying up. The thought of having to close the charity makes my heart actually hurt and I really will fight until the last penny, I've not given up and a few amazing people are helping me to try and secure funding, raise money, pull together and make sure that Little Troopers remains. I will keep you posted.

Whatever your situation this Christmas remind yourself it is just one day, just another roast and time will pass bringing your light at the end of the tunnel closer. Be kind to yourself and know you aren't alone.

To all of you who have been so supportive over the last week or so THANK YOU, you are making me more determind then ever to carry on and to all of you who I have met in the last few days you have reminded me why I founded Little Troopers and why it is so important the charity is here for military children.

All my love and hugs, I will be thinking of so many of you over the next week so. Louise xxx

From me and the big man in red HAPPY CHRISTMAS!

It never gets any easier

Firstly I feel really bad that the blog has been somewhat neglected! its nearly a whole YEAR since I last wrote a blogpost but the charity work with Little Troopers has been so so busy with the launch of our Little Troopers Treasures app and the Little Troopers at School project, can't believe its August already.

I tend to want to blog when I am in a reflective place wanting to share my thoughts and feelings on a situation I am in. As I always say I am living and breathing this military family life...my husband is serving, I have a daughter, we living in military housing, we move a lot...I am right there with all of you who are also living it.

At 0300hrs my husband got up in the night put on his uniform and went out the door, we won't see him again for a few months as he deploys overseas.

He has been away so much in the 17 years I have known him, we've been married 14 of those years. I've been a serving soldier, I have been the one going away on deployments and it really is easier being the one going away, you are busy and distracted, surrounded by people 24/7 so time seems to pass faster. He would probably disagree!

Many say to me "you must get used to it I suppose" Nope, I don't "it must get easier" Nope, it doesn't "you are made of strong stuff, you'll be fine" Yup I am and I am sure I will be. BUT I absolutely feel it gets harder the longer I am in this game, I get more anxious, it takes longer in that readjustment period once they have gone and I seem to miss him more. Its like wading through treacle sometimes.

On the positives I have learnt over the years how I deal with separation best, I now have the awesome Little Troopers community to draw from, I have developed coping mechanisms and my friends right by my side. So it isn't all treacle wading!

This time he hasn't gone anywhere dangerous "at least he's not going to war" yes I suppose all those people who have said that to me the last week are right, he isn't and thank god because I really didn't cope well with Iraq or Afghanistan and I truly believe those deployments changed me as a person (that's another blog post) but wherever he goes it is away, there is a time difference, communication is sporadic and I can't bloody ring him to tell him the cat has been sick on the bloody carpet AGAIN and I hate cleaning it up.

Even the cat didn't want him to go!

My Little Trooper is not so little she's 14 now and very aware he's going away for a few months and got a bit moody about it but didn't want to talk, she clung on to him a little tighter last night when he said goodbye. She's good company when he is away and once the Summer holidays are over routine will prevail! Teenagers are hard though, just like babies and toddlers are, it is just a different set of challenges....should I let her go to Thorpe Park on her own?! suddenly I have to make that decision on my own because he is away and I really don't know the answer.

I will blog throughout this deployment because I want every other military spouse out there with a partner away to know we are all finding our way through this military life, we are all in this together and hopefully can take strength from each other.

I'm right here living it with you. 

I text my husband when he was boarding his flight and said "I'm sad" and he replied "Don't be poppet be positive, it will go quicker" he's right...lets be positive, together.

Love Louise xxx

Overlooked once again...

September already!!!! I really hoped to be writing a blog post about launching the Little Troopers at School project but yet again service children are overlooked, a niche group that is just too small in the grand scheme of things to support, apparently.
...............But our children are resilient and MUST be used to it by now so surely they will just chug along just fine....

I don't believe they will and I truly believe in the Little Troopers at School Project, I am passionate that if service children in schools got more tailored and specific support they would experience consistency which would be a huge benefit. Not just in one school that has a large number of military children and who has a good practise in place but at EVERY school they go to so they can expect the same level of support no matter where they live.

So the Service Pupil Premium exists but is grossly misunderstood because there is no guidance, yes the government created that pot of money, in fact David Cameron himself told me face to face he was very proud of the fact it was his idea to create the fund....but there it stops. The fund isn't enforced, schools are not accountable on how it should be spent and there is no guidance.

Many Little Troopers transitioning through many schools, different countries, different counties, different systems yet there is no uniform transition process to make this a smooth experience for military families. There should be. Our Little Trooper Transition Passport would combat this problem.

The Department of Education and Little Troopers were working closely after meeting Nicky Morgan former Secretary of State for Education....then Brexit happened and everyone and everything within government changed and so did the priorities...service children are no longer on the agenda.

And just like that the project comes to a halt.

Little Troopers still wants the project to come to fruition and will do all it can to gain funding to enable this to happen and to ensure children of military personnel are not failed and do not face disadvantage because the move around frequently or because of their parents chosen career.

Today no one will accept responsibility and make this project happen...not the MOD and not the Government so WE WILL! I will work tirelessly until this project is launched, because I do believe our Little Troopers need this support.

I'll keep you posted!

Louise xxx

Little Troopers at School

My daughter became a military child not through her own choice.

I am not a military child but I decided to join the British Army as a teenager, my husband was a military child and also decided to join the British Army as a teenager. Our decisions to follow a career in the military has meant our daughter has experienced various situations I can only empathise with because I have never been in her situation.

Most notably moving lots, different countries, different counties, this has resulted in transition through many schools. Lets go back to the beginning.....

Our daughter started school when she was four, where we lived at that time it was an infant school, she was in that school until she was seven years old but then we had to move her and this time to a junior school which she then remained in until she was nine years old, so early years she experienced stability.

Then it started getting complex through no fault of anyone really but the age she was and the postings we got it became a bit of a patchwork of schools and systems and curriculum's;

Year 5 - Junior school. Posted and moved location.
Year 6 - Primary school
Year 7 - Secondary school
Year 8 - Middle school. Posted and moved location.
Year 9 - Upper school

So in five years every September she has had to move schools, new uniforms, new teachers, new ways and often new locations. This has bought lots of uncertainty and nerves and inconsistency. I will also say at this point I think it has made her grow in confidence and personal strength, I know at nearly 13 years old she is now not scared of walking into a classroom knowing not a soul and holding her head up high, saying hello and digging in to make it familiar.
Some of the school changes have been better than others some more supported than others and only one of those schools understood and catered for her needs as a military child who experiences transition and also repeated separation from her dad, I thank that school because they rock and they are doing a great job. The others.....haven't made it a positive experience for us as a family.

It isn't always the schools fault, they just don't always know the challenges military children face (separation, deployment, moving repeatedly, friendship losses, change, lack of roots...the list is endless) and if they don't know the challenges and the implications of those how can they adequately support them?

As a family we have and still are experiencing the first hand affects of moving frequently with a school age child, we know we are definatly not alone in this either so many of you will have had similar experiences and there is not adequate support from anywhere for these scenarios. To help schools, to help families who can then help their children so it isn't a negative experience and ultimately so it doesn't affect their education.

I'm so proud of Little Troopers and what we have already achieved and it is forever important to me to follow projects and initiatives that I am passionate about, that I have lived and breathed, where I truly believe we can make an impact to thousands of Little Troopers and their families.

Little Troopers at School

Little Troopers at School is a project we will be launching to help schools to help families to help Little Troopers. 

There is a government fund that exists called the Service Pupil Premium, an annual sum of £300 per service child paid to schools for pastoral/non educational support due to the fact they face slightly different daily challenges and situations to other children. This fund isn't completely understood by schools or families and we want to change that and educate schools on how they can best support service children and we of course want to celebrate the schools already using the fund as intended and supporting those children in need.

Follow our journey as the project unfolds in 2016 and keep sharing your feedback with us, we will be putting together a service parent focus group (as part of our Little Trooper Network volunteer scheme that exists) to compliment this project and we'd love you to be involved. Read more here

As always the Little Troopers community is a strong one and together we can make a difference to all the Little Troopers out there.

Louise xxx

Our first and very special London Marathon runner!

Back in 2015 we got a lovely email from Becky who had won a ballot place in the London Marathon 2016 and she'd chosen Little Troopers as her charity!!!

I am always so touched by the support and when people choose to fundraise for Little Troopers is brings such a smile, we're a really small charity compared to other military charities and every single penny counts, we support so many thousands in so many locations we try as hard as possible to make every pound stretch as far as possible.

For a charity to buy places for the London Marathon is hundreds of pounds per place so we've never been in a position to have any so this really was fantastic for Becky to have got a ballot place an even more so she chose us!!! You can apply for a 2017 ballot place HERE 2-6th May 2016 you need to enter.

24th April 2016 was London Marathon Day and I kept a track of Beckys progress all day online and posting updates on social media, it was just so fantastic to have someone running those 26 miles wearing a Little Trooper running vest, I felt so so proud.

Becky totally smashed the run and her donation target and her sponsorship has gone over £900, her account of the experience is one everyone should read and I've posted it below.

But from me, what a special lady to be our first ever London Marathon runner, thank you soooooo much Becky.

Louise xxxx

So, I did it!!
Everything from my waist down hurts and I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to manage at work but I am so proud of myself for getting through it and finishing in 5 hrs 26 minutes and 26 seconds - which included a wee stop at mile 19!!
The whole experience was completely overwhelming, no matter how many people tell you about the amazing crowd support and how important it is to have your name on your vest, you cannot imagine what it is going to be like until you are there.
The sweets from random strangers that keep you going (especially the jelly tots from he hot fireman!!). The guys running in full chain mail, a giant dinosaur costume or with a tumble dryer on his back. The hundreds of different charities on people's vests. The other runners that you chat to along the way. Running past the Cutty Sark. Stopping for a hug from Mike Thompson and the boys at mile 12 which was already 4 miles further than I'd ever run in one go. Crossing Tower bridge. Coughing and nearly wee-ing a bit at mile 16! Having someone shout 'nearly there' just after mile 16 and having the mental discipline to not go over a me punch them when there's still 10 miles to go. Texting the husband during a planned walk break to ask why on earth I ever though it was a good idea to run a marathon. Passing a guy at mile 19 dressed as Jesus, carrying a cross on his back in bare feet. Being passed by a Rhino, Womble and Darth Vader. The pats on the back and arms round the shoulders from other runners to check that during walk breaks I was ok. Thinking that you can't run another step but realising that it's quicker than walking to the end and everything hurts anyway. Seeing Tom and the boys again at mile 25 when you know that you really are 'nearly there'. Running through the park towards Buckingham palace and then turning the corner onto The Mall. The girl called Hannah at the 26 mile marker that saw me walking and told me to finish it running with her. Crossing the finish line with one finger in the air in a salute to ‪#‎oneinamillion‬
I want to thank all of you for your amazing support and sponsorship over the last few weeks and know just how much good it can do for Little Troopers, but most of all I need to that the great British public, without them I would I never have got round.
At mile 20 I said never again. In only a few hours I decided that I have no intention of ever running a marathon again, unless it is London.
Anybody else who wants to sponsor me can at https://mydonate.bt.com/fundraisers/beckythomps