Blog from the founder of the charity Little Troopers. Military wife and mum sharing thoughts and feelings of being a British Armed Forces family.

Little Troopers is a registered charity supporting all children with parents serving in the British Armed Forces, regular or reserve. We provide fundamental resources, initiatives and events to ease and aid repeated separation periods aiming to keep parent and child connected and bonded even when miles apart

13 Sep 2017

Its never rains but it pours....

I promised to blog an honest account throughout this separation period we are experiencing and I want it to be the good days and the bad days, by doing this I am hoping it will really show anyone from the military community that stumbles across this blog that everything you are feeling is normal and we are all going through exactly the same emotions.

Sharing will hopefully bring strength and comfort.

I WAS DOING SO WELL!!!!! I really was and three weeks in I gave myself a pat on the back, no tears thus far and day by day I was getting through them....we were all present and correct at school and work and we were all fed! Total result in my eyes.

Experience has taught me that when solo parenting over a long period it is all OK if everything is going to plan, everyone is well, no surprises and even the odd singular hurdle here and there I seem to be able to navigate all goes horribly wrong when the wheels completely come off and a multitude of things all happen at the same time and I feel totally overwhelmed, totally alone and totally beaten.

That is exactly what happened these last few days....the wheels dramatically came off....although I am fully aware things are magnified at the moment and I am feeling hypersensitive because communications are so sporadic and almost non existent.

It's all real life stuff nothing major on reflection.....I have really bad ulcers at the moment which are making me dribble (attractive) and literally wince with pain, I spilt gel nail remover on my laptop which has made all the keys lift and some even come off (after some panic TLC the laptop started working again), the cat was dramatically sick everywhere which I just can't handle and my daughter has been off school poorly on top of work being really busy and all the normal stuff.

I just sat on my bed and sobbed. 

I have a great small network of best friends mostly from school days and I text a few of them and gained some strength, they made me laugh and I reminded myself it is OK to cry, it is OK to be sad, it is OK to be overwhelmed when a few things go wrong. Tomorrow is another day.
  • Try to have a few very close family or friends who you feel comfortable calling mid wobble 
  • Be kind to yourself, don't strive for perfection because we can really only do so much
  • Try where at all possible to have a bad day and not let it spiral into a bad week
  • Do not take your nail varnish off next to your laptop!!!!

RIP keyboard keys
If there is anyone who is completely unaffected while their serving partner is away for a period of time then I totally take my hat off to them, sometimes it hits us when we are least expecting it and it is definitely normal whatever your circumstance to have a wobble here and there, we are all human.

I am coming out the other side, seeing some favourite faces over the next few days which always fills my emotional fuel tank to the brim and bonjela is my new best friend!

If you are having a wobble this week, read this and know you are not alone I am right there with you.

A couple of blogs coming up that will be more about information spreading, good sites and products I have found along the way to help military families....if you have any to add that have helped you let me know and I will include.

Lots of love, Louise xxx

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